blue pencil points

* there was this korean comic series that i was really really into... Titled BLUE, it appropriately detailed the lives of 6 or 7 young adults all going through individual bouts of loneliness and longing. and of course, the irony being that they all could relate to one another and yet, confide to no one. there was a word i discovered which i really liked and still am thrilled to find in any of my relationships: 공감지대.

* being at the hospital all day has been a lot easier and more rewarding than I expected. I've been so much more efficient (my Kanji vocabulary is twice as large, bringing the total to about 30.... out of 2000...), eaten less (hahahaa), and in all honestly, proven to myself that I really do LOVE my grandma. choose to believe it YooJung, you're doing it out of love not obligation. and that's a pleasant surprise. her condition is ok. i can't really say how her recovery will be... her rehab hasn't gone as smoothly as expected (and we didn't expect much in the first place...)... but again, things could be much worse. so i'm thankful for my newly gained personal nursing degree.

* not to pull a BLUE character out of my pocket...actually... hell, it's my blog... but i find it always surprising out most loneliness roots out of the experience of being around people.

* i'm realizing more and more that i need to sacrifice and stay DRIVEN for success. I WANT TO BECOME AN ACTOR. SO. that means, SAVE UP MONEY. LOSE WEIGHT. AND GET TALENT. so SAVE MORE (SPEND LESS), EXERCISE MORE (EAT LESS), LEARN MORE (WASTE TIME LESS) and PRAY YOUR ASS OFF. all this shiz is so redundant.

* a simple pleasure... when i get a text message from the person that i was thinking about at that very moment. girls, boys, whoever.

* i want to be FREE. completely and utterly. even from myself.

* sometimes i want a sugar-daddy. except no shadiness.

* i love lee bum soo. he's only 5'5 or something like that. he's almost 40. he sometimes looks like a frog. but i love him so much that it hurts.

* the fact of the matter is... i don't like to get serious... but i still want sincerity. i want to have fun... but i don't want to play games. just honesty and good times. why is that balance so hard? i want that balance with lee bum soo. :)

* so i'm glad michelle and my scene didn't get cut out of "21." I have yet to see it... but keep an eye out during hte Chinese parade scene ok?


this was a silly blog. oh well. :)